Mom jeans is a humorously
pejorative term for a specific type of fit of women's jeans, considered to
be both unfashionable, and unflattering to the wearer's bodyshape. It also
tends to have excess space in the zipper/crotch and leg areas. The style is
often accompanied by a blouse or shirt that is tucked into the jeans.
We all know about the “mom jeans” stereotype
still lingering from the mid-1990s, right?
Tapered legs, Loose-fitting, Elastic waistband, light-wash,
makes-your-butt-look-two-times-as-long mom jeans. The type of jeans that should
be sitting in a minivan. The high waist style makes the ass appear strangely
longer & fatter than what it really is.
About this time last year, still early in my
pregnancy I started to worry about some really “important” things, like if my
epidural was going to kick in before delivery, if I was going to poop on the
labor table (heard this happens!), deciding on a nursery theme and trying not
to go baby crazy. Maybe worrying about these random things helped me to avoid
thinking about the actual important things, like if the baby was going to be
healthy. Anyways, one thing that was on my mind, and I’m sure is on the mind of
most extremely pregnant women is getting back into those pre-pregnancy jeans/pants.
I’m not even kidding; I had anxiety about never fitting into normal clothes
again.
In the beginning, I couldn’t wait to have a
cute pregnant belly, cute? When my favorite jeans no longer buttoned, I used a
hair tie to hook the button into the hole, which gave me a “little” stretch…but
not really. Unfortunately, the day came
when that no longer cut it. My thighs were expanding, my butt had multiplied–
it’s not just the waistline that is affected. I decided no more pants for me (except my
WONDERFUL maternity, yoga pants that I still wear and LOVE)! I wore a dress EVERY single day that I
stepped out of my house. Most women will
disagree that being pregnant during the summer is horrendous but it wasn’t too
bad. I mean I had an excuse why I looked
mammoth in my bathing suit and I got to stretch out all my dresses/tunics so
now this year I get to buy ALL new stuff!!
J I rather spend money on NON-maternity
outfits.
Anyways after having our beautiful girl, I
waited a few weeks to go into the dreadful mall and try to find some clothes
that fit my un-godly shaped, new body. After
about 12 hours of trying on around oh I say 10,000 pairs of jeans in every
single damn store known to man it finally came to me...During this nauseating
experience I came to understand why “mom jeans” happen, maybe? What mother has
time to walk around the mall for 9 hours trying to find jeans that can possibly
be able to pull up over her newly shaped post-baby body? NO ONE. I mean really anything is an
improvement from the untied bathrobe or stretchy pants (hubby’s term) that you
have been rockin’ the past couple months. I finally was able to find a pair &
they were definitely a step up.
So yes I can successfully say I avoided the “mom
jeans”!
Mistakes
NOT to Make:
Super low-rise – NO
to crack!
Too Big –
Shapeless!
Too Small – Say NO
to Muffin Tops!
Light-colored – Dark
wash looks flattering on ALL.
No Stretch – Need Flexibility.
Buying the Trend –
Find the perfect style for YOU.
Too expensive –
Wait to splurge!
Too Cheap – Handle
the up’s and down’s of Motherhood, literally!